what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
