I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
