we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
