What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
