can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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