i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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