Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
