It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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