just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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