So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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