ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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