singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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