just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize