Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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