so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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