I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
