Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
