a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
