It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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