Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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