I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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