i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
