just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
