yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
