You can't motorboat a personality
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Randomize
