I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
