if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i drank out of a bidet.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
