U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
