Buhtt sex?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I had to cum in my sink.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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