I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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