In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
