Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize