I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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