shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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