The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
