At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
