we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
