In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize