I am puke
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
