I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
