I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
