He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
