what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
