hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
