do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
