Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Floor bacon is actually really good
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
