Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize