She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
