I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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