His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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